Beck's Blog

"Hey it's me Beck. Thought I'd take a moment to blog about my lovely girlfriend Jade. (She told me if I blog on TheSlap, I HAVE to blog about HER... So this one's for you, Jade.)

Let's just say that dating Jade isn't exactly a picnic all of the time. See, most girls love when you compliment them and go out of your way to make them happy. But with Jade, it's a little more complicated. She takes every compliment the wrong way. So, for fun I've been super nice to her all week just to see her reaction. Here are the results.

Monday:
Me: "Wow. Jade you look really pretty today."
Her: "So what?! Most days I look hideous?! Is that what you're trying to tell me? Why do you even date me if I disgust you so much?"

Tuesday:
Me: "I like that outfit you're wearing."
Her: "Oh cuz it's got a little pink in it?! Well sorry if I'm not super-girly like all the other ditzes who walk around wearing bows and flowers and tacky pink dresses. I'm not your little dress-up doll. Ugh!"

Wednesday:
Me: "Hey thanks for getting me a cup of coffee."
Her: "You say that like I never do anything for you! I feel so unappreciated!"

Thursday:
Me: "Here, let me carry that bag for you."
Her: "Don't use that tone of voice to me. Yeah, don't deny it! There was a tone!"

Friday: Me: "Hi, baby."
Her: "So you don't even say my name anymore? Did you forget it? Why are you being shady?"

Sigh."
— Beck Oliver

"Sup guys. So you know how when anyone gets famous, there's always a tell-all book or biography written about them?

That got me thinking, when one of us makes it big, what will be the title of our books? Here's what I'm thinking....

Yeah, these probably won't be the biggest sellers. Oh well. "
— Beck Oliver