List of posts by Beck Oliver

This is the page of Beck Oliver's TheSlap posts!

Posts

 * André: What's up, man? Where have you been?Beckseason2.jpg
 * Beck: Sick. Jade's taking care of me.
 * André: Oooh, sorry about that.
 * Beck: Hi, André. It's Jade. I'm sitting right next to Beck and NEWSFLASH: I know how to read.
 * André: Right... I was kidding. You're the best girlfriend. Sweet, caring...
 * Beck: Stop typing.


 * Beck: I finally picked out my Halloween costume. I'm going as a professional bowler.
 * Jade: That's stupid. I already picked out your costume. It's a white sheet.
 * Beck: A ghost?
 * Jade: No, you'd literally be NOTHING. I thought it was very clever artistic statement. And besides, if girls can't see your face, they won't hit on you.


 * Beck: Yep. I'm back. Jade promised to stop freaking out.
 * Jade: Hi, babe. Welcome back to theSlap.com
 * Jade: Did you see the email I sent you?
 * Jade: How come you didn't respond to my email yet?Ooliver.jpg
 * Jade: Are you getting these messages on your phone? I texted you, too!
 * Jade: BABE!
 * Beck: Do you want me to delay my account again?
 * Jade: Sorry, I'll stop. Love you.


 * Beck: Going to bed. If I post any updates in the next 8 hours, it's just me text-sleeping again.


 * Beck: I bought my girlfriend flowers. Forgot she hate flowers. Starting a list of all her "dislikes". It's LOOOONG already.


 * Jade: I can't believe you removed that you're in a relationship with me!
 * Beck: Well, you broke up with me.
 * Jade: Fine! Well, I'm removing mine, too.
 * Cat: What's going on with you two??? Someone please tell me!
 * Jade: No!


 * Beck: So Jade made me change my profile pic to let other girls know that we're back together. But it's a good pic, so I'll leave it up for awhile.


 * Beck: I switched back to my old pic... but don't worry, Jade and I didn't break up. I just really like this one.
 * Jade: I liked the other one better.
 * Beck: Knew you would ...
 * Rex: Hey, can you email me the one of you guys kissing?
 * Jade: Ew. Gross. No.


 * Beck: Earthquakes????? Nope - one of the tires on my RV just blew out. Part of the fun of living in a house on wheels.


 * Beck: Heat wave in Los Angeles. Thirsty. Thirsty. Thirsty. Please send water!


 * Beck: Someone on TheSlap is using an avatar that looks just like me as a hobo! What's up with that?


 * Beck: Where are my hair gels and stuff?
 * Jade: I removed them from your bathroom before I left for the weekend. I don't want you looking good when I'm gone.


 * Beck: Partying in Hermosa. Jade can't come. Who should I invite?
 * Sinjin: I'm available.


 * Beck: Jade's at the movies. Chilling with my dad. Feels funny to not be getting yelled at for a minute...


 * Beck: Grillling up some burgers then chilling in the RV. Andre's coming over. Couldn't be a better Friday.
 * Jade: I thought you said you can't stand guy's night out and would rather be with me.
 * Rex: The dude LOVES guy's night... See ya later Beck. I'm coming over, just gotta figure out a way to ditch Rob first.


 * Beck: Working on my car. Engine grease all over me. Should have this baby up and running soon.
 * Jade: Tell me you love me.
 * Beck: I love you.
 * Jade: Okay, resume your manly activities.
 * Beck: Thanks, babe.
 * Jade: Hot.


 * Beck: If I don't become a famous actor, my back-up plan is to sell products on TV. If you can sell a blanket with arms, you can sell anything.


 * Beck: Well, Friday. Here I am. What are you going to do with me?


 * Beck: I'm babysitting a puppy. It just peed on my bed. Puppies are gross.


 * Beck: I parked my RV in the school parking lot last night. So I literally rolled out of bed and came to class.


 * Beck: I bought one of those remotes that help you find your phone if it's lost. But now I can't find it anywhere. I need a remote for my remote.


 * Beck: Thinking about getting a tattoo on my shoulder. What should it say?


 * Beck: I was in a movie. Then I was out of the movie. Now I'm back in the movie. Interesting week.


 * Beck: Sikowitz's van smells like cheese. The ping pong team should really get their own bus.


 * Beck: Just witnessed a mad hot-cheese attack! Now, I'm gonna go feel Andre's feet some more.


 * Beck: Had to pick up some production equipment in Burbank today and drove by a high school that looks exactly like Hollywood Arts. Weird.


 * Beck: What's the best part of staying up late? It's 1 am and I got nothin' to do. Suggestions?


 * Beck: sittin' in Sikowit's class. Should i tell him that he has bits of cheese stuck in his hair?


 * Beck: Dilemma: My hair got stuck in my car door today. Should I cut it?
 * Jade: Don't even think about it. And why are you asking anyone besides me?!?


 * Beck: Happy Veterans Day. I'm dating Jade so I know exactly what they've been through.


 * Beck: 2 Days of school next week! Thank you Thanksgiving!


 * Beck: Did you here my girl singing at the Karaoke-Dokie? Talk about hot.
 * Jade: You better have meant me.
 * Beck: I did.
 * Tori: What? No love for Louise Nordoff?
 * Jade: Shut it Louise.


 * Beck: I wonder who was the FIRST person to eat cheese. How did they know eating mold would be good?


 * Beck: Weekend Plans: Surfing or Snowboarding? I love L.A.


 * Beck: What is a one-horse open sleigh? Aren't all sleighs open?


 * Beck: Airplanes fly. True story.


 * Beck: Another question for you: What the heck does Auld Lang Syne mean? I'm literally to tired to look it up.


 * Beck: Someone told me my hair was so shiny, they could see their reflectioin in it.


 * Beck: Went to the park with Jade ... She tripped a five-year old. BAD IDEA.


 * Beck: I lost a bet to Andre. Now my Diddly Bop costume is my profile pic for the week. Thanks again man.


 * Beck: Was invited on a private yacht with an all-girl band. Jade said no. Now, we're watching a chick flick together. Yay.


 * Beck: Still confused about what makes pink lemonade pink.


 * Beck: The best thing about dating Jade is not having to buy any Valentine's Day gifts. Saves me like $35 bucks.
 * Jade: You were only going to spend $35 bucks on me!!!!! That's it. I want flowers and jewelry NOW.


 * Beck: How come monkey get tails and we don't?
 * Sinjin: I kinda had a tail but the doctors removed it when I was 4.


 * Beck: I just took the "What Job Suits You Best" test and it said I should either be a actor or an elephant trainer ... think I'll stick with actor.


 * Beck: Spring break is in a few weeks, so ... vacation ideas: Mexico or Canada? decisions ... decisions...


 * Beck: Had to move my house so my dad could get something out of the garage. How many people can say that? #livinginanRV


 * Beck: I'm eating a bagel. Wow that should not have been a stupid update. Sorry.


 * Beck: Anyone Canadian out there? Please tell Jade there's nothing wrong with being born in Canada?
 * Jade: Yeah sure, like I'm going to trust the word of an Canadian.


 * Beck: If I were going to be deserted on an island and could only bring one thing, I'd bring my PearPad.
 * Jade: I'd rethink that answer if I were you.


 * Beck: Man, how do girls wear theese heels? Feet hurt so bad ... gonna go stick 'em in a tub of cold butter.


 * Beck: coffee coffee coffee coffee coffeeeeeeee!!!! ah, back to normal ... ;-) Well, as close to normal as I'm going to get.


 * Beck: Will someone please tell Jade that ordering her a salad does not mean I think that she's fat?!
 * Jade: I still can't believe you did that.
 * Beck: You wouldn't tell me what you wanted!
 * Jade: You should be able to read my mind!


 * Beck: There was literally a couch in the middle of the freeway this morning. Ah, the joys of driving in LA.


 * Beck: Gotta help a friend move to the valley this Saturday.... Sometimes it's not fun being the guy with the truck.
 * Jade: What?! This Saturday?! AND MISS MY PLAY?!?!
 * Beck: But it's not your play. You're Tori's understudy.
 * Jade: Yes... unless something happens to her, which it MIGHT!
 * Tori: Jade! Stop saying that!


 * Beck: Going to Canada for a father-son fishing trip. My dad thinks Canadian fish taste better than American ones.


 * Beck: Hanging out at a friend's movie set and all they have at craft service is refrigerated mussels. I'm almost hungry enough to eat them.


 * Beck: I'm UN-SCARE-ABLE! Nothing frightens me at all. Well, except maybe Jade. Ha, JK sweetie.


 * Beck: Asked my dad what he wants for Father's Day. He said, "For you to break up with Jade." He's still mad about the whole dog attack thing.


 * Beck: Jade is the best girlfriend ever. Jade is beautiful. Jade is better than anyone else.
 * Beck: Guess who logged onto my account and wrote this?


 * Beck: I literally only own like 3 pairs of socks. Should probably go shopping soon.


 * Beck: Hey guys. Just wrote a new blog. It's called Jade Hates Compliments. Check it out! (or here)


 * Beck: Sitting on a floaty in a pool at a Hollywood Mansion. Things could be worse.
 * Jade: What?? Why wasn't I invited?
 * Andre: Eating Beck's famous BBQ ribs. He just grilled up a rack of 'em. Things could be worse.
 * Jade: You took Andre as your plus one?!?! Things WILL get worse!


 * Beck: Jade once told me if I ever grew a mustache she would never kiss me again. At least profile-me can sport one. Lucky chap.


 * Beck: My hair's too thick to wear a baseball cap. Life is hard.


 * Beck: They just discontinued my favorite hair gel. I'm currently on step 3 of the grieving process.


 * Beck: Don't wear flannel in the valley. It's 102 degrees. My sweat is sweating.
 * Cat: Boys wear so much clothes


 * Beck: My neighborhood car wash says they'll clean any vehicle for $10. So I drove my house over there. I think they hate me.


 * Beck: At the beach one last time before school starts. I'll miss you Summer. Don't forget to write.
 * Jade: Who's Summer??!!! And why are you at the beach with her?
 * Beck: We need to talk about your jealousy issues.


 * Beck: A bird just pooped on my head during lunch. He's been eyeing me for days and he finally struck. Anyone got a napkin?


 * Beck: Okay guys here are my choices for the weekend: Go to a film festival in Newport or go scissor shopping with Jade. What should I do?
 * Jade: There's only one right answer to that question.
 * Tori: Scissor shopping? Is that a real thing?


 * Beck: I get all my fashion inspiration from 80's teen movies. Today I'm rocking the jean jacket and fingerless gloves. Wanna join the club?


 * Beck: Name something you've never worn or ever plan on wearing. I'll start: khakis.
 * Sinjin: Relaxed fit jeans.
 * Rex: Underpants.

​
 * Beck: Weird how you can be washing your car one min and then out of nowhere a bunch of girls show up and a huge bikini water fight breaks out?!
 * Jade: WHAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!
 * Beck: Ha. Just kidding.
 * Beck: I got an actual letter in the mail today! That hasn't happened in years! It was junk mail, but it was still kind of cool.


 * Beck: It seems some guys have forgotten men's room etiquette. We DO NOT talk while side by side at the urinals. Got it?


 * Robbie: But I just wanted your opinion on my new pants!


 * Beck: Jade just called and asked if she could borrow 200 rolls of toilet paper. Should I give them to her or call the cops?


 * Beck: Shopping with Jade. While she tries on 24 different black shirts, I'll watch the football game on my phone.


 * Beck: Tomorrow is "Wear a Kilt Day" at Hollywood Arts. Should I participate?
 * Jade: You better not. I don't want a boyfriend who looks better in a skirt than I do.


 * Beck: It's 6 AM and I haven't gone to bed yet. Do I even attempt to go to sleep or just try to make it thru the rest of the day?


 * Beck: Didn't get much sleep last night... wish I could be a girl for a day and cover up my under-eye circles with some makeup.


 * Beck: Why is everyone saying I drink too much coffee!!!! I DON'T DRINK TOO MUCH COFFEE!!! Aaaahhh!!!! My heart is vibrating!!!! Ineedsomemorecoffee!!!!


 * Beck: Just had to do an emotional scene while wearing green, full-body tights with ping pong balls all over 'em. Motion capture acting is weird.


 * Beck: Got a Christmas package from my Canadian grandma -- a jar of maple syrup and a DVD set of Degrassi. Does she know me or what?


 * Beck: Why do we say "Merry Christmas" in America? We don't say "Merry Halloween!" What gives?
 * Sikowitz: I say Merry Halloween.
 * Jade: Yeah, but you're weird so you don't count.


 * Beck: Having a great time at the New Year's Eve party! Even Jade's having fun. Of course she calls it a "Death of 2011 Party."


 * Beck: The rose parade should be closer to Valentine's Day. That way you can just pic flowers off the street to give to your girlfriend.


 * Beck: Jade almost beat up a girl for feeling my hair. That girl was my hairdresser. Next time I get a trim, she'll have to wait in the car.


 * Beck: It's almost beach season! Wait, what am I talking about? It's always beach season around here!


 * Beck: Vice Principal Dickers is my favorite person ever. (Hoping this update will get me OUT of detention next time.)


 * Beck: Single. Yup.
 * Robbie: I think I'm going to cry.
 * Beck: Don't worry, man. It's gonna be okay.


 * Beck: Every time I fill up my gas tank, I wish that someone would invent teleportation already.


 * Beck: On an indie film set at 4:30 am. Sooo tired. The craft service coffee is NOT working.


 * Beck: I had to take my house to get an oil change today… I do live in an RV, remember.


 * Beck: At a friend's really terrible play. I'm like the only one still left in the theater. Think I can sneak out during intermission?


 * Beck: Sometimes I forget how cool it is that I can see the Hollywood sign from my house.


 * Beck: Accidentally just brewed a whole pot of coffee. If no one comes over to help me drink it, i'm going to have a very long and jittery night.


 * Beck: No the rumors aren't true, I DID NOT kiss Tori. She DID spit a chewed-up hoagie into my hand though.


 * Beck: Someone broke into my RV and only stole 1 permanent marker. Worst robbery ever.