Transcript:The Bad Roommate

This is the transcript for The Bad Roommate. For the page click here.

School Hallways Lockers

Tori: Heyyyy

Andre: Hey. So what's the big news?

Tori: How do you know I have news?

Andre: Well. Whenever you have news this is how you walk up to me. You go... (imitating Tori) Heyyyyy.

Tori: That is not what I do when I have news

Andre: So you got news?

Tori: Yeahhh.

Andre: Let's go.

Tori: Ok... so yesterday I was at Neutronium Records meeting with Mason and I met Kojeezy.

Andre: Shut the fridge.

Tori: So I told him about our song writing class here.

Andre: Oh man.

Tori: And he's gonna come here and let us all play our songs for him.

Andre: Sweet Joseph.

Tori: And if he hears one that he likes he might buy it and produce it.

Andre: Ohhhhh.

Tori: Hey (points to some people) let's go tell those people over there.

Andre: Yeah wait wait wait wait. Let's do this the right way.

Tori and Andre both go up to them saying "Heyyyy"

(Theme Song)

School Hallways Stairs

Beck: No. That's insane.

Robbie: Wait. Watch what happens when I zoom in. (zooms in)

Beck: No way.

Robbie: Yeah

Cat: (comes) Hi.

Robbie: Oh and I can turn it this way.

Beck: Oh my god. This is blowing my mind.

Cat: HIIII.

Robbie: Hey Cat.

Beck: Hey.

Cat: What are you guys looking at?

Robbie: PearMaps updated their app and now you can look at any place in the world.

Beck: In High Res.

Cat: No way. I don't get it.

Beck: Show her.

Robbie: See here's an overhead shot of our school.

Cat: Cool.

Robbie: Look, now I'll zoom in.

Jade: (comes) Hey you guys looking at the new PearMaps app?

Robbie: Yeah now you can zoom in from any angle.

Cat: Oh my god. That's where we eat lunch.

Robbie: Yeah. The PearMaps sattelite must have taken the picture a few months ago.

Beck: From space.

Cat: (looks at cieling and waves) Hi.

Jade: Cat, were inside.

Beck: Hey is that us?

Robbie: Oh my god. That is us.

Jade: Oh yeah I'm wearing my red boots.

Beck: Uhh... Can you zoom in tighter on Jade?

Robbie: I think. Uh zoom a zoom zoom. (zooms in to a picture of Jade "picking" her nose).

Jade: No. I'm not...

Cat: Picking your nose?

Jade: CAT!!!! I was not picking it. I was just scratching the outside of it like this (scratches outside of her nose).

Robbie: See from this angle it looks like your just...

Jade: Don't say it. Ok, no one mentions this to anyone.

Beck: We won't.

Robbie: Promise.

Cat: You mean you picking your nose?

Jade: CAT!!!! I was scratching it.

Cat: Rightttt.

Jade: (leaves)

Cat, Robbie, and Beck: (laughing)

Jade: (turns around)

They all stop laughing.

Andre's House

Andre: (playing on piano)

Charlotte: Andre! It's raining in my bathroom.

Andre: Grandma you were just taking a shower.

Charlotte: I'm gonna go get some orange juice.

Andre: (keeps playing piano)

Charlotte: Andre! There's a helicopter in my kitchen.

Andre: That's just the cieling fan.

Charlotte: It's just the cieling fan. (goes off-screen) Andre!

Andre: I'm out.

Andre updates status. Hey - anybody wanna TRADE grandmothers? Let's do it Mood: Frazled

Tori's House

Holly: (gets text message and laughs at it).

Tori: (tries to look at her phone)

Holly: Just read your book.

Trina: (takes trophy out of box) Yeahhhhhhhh.

Tori: What is that?

Trina: My trophy!

Holly: For what?

Trina: My book shelf.

Tori: But... how did you... get it?

Trina: I took mom's credit card I went online and bought it. Trina Vega. 1st place. Go me!

Doorbell rings

Trina: Someone get that (goes upstairs and starts singing) It's an all night party that were getting into!

Tori: (answers door) Oh. Hey.

Andre: You busy?

Tori: No. Is everything okay?

Andre: Yeah it's just I was trying to write my song, you know, for Kojeezy. My grandma's driving me out of my mind. Would it be cool if I...

Tori: You wanna write your song here?

Andre: Would you mind?

Tori: Noooo. Not at all.

Andre: Oh thanks. (goes and gets bags)

Tori: Wait. what are you...?

Andre: (comes in with bags)

Tori: Oh.

Andre: (turns around and looks at her)

Tori: Ohhh.

School Hallways

Tori is sleeping on the stairs and Jade sees her.

Jade: (goes up to Tori and uses a whistle to wake her up).

Tori: Ahhh. (falls down stairs).

Jade: (smiling).

Tori: What happened? Was I sleeping?

Jade: You were.

Tori: Did I hear a loud whistle?

Jade: (putting whistle in backpack) No. You probably just dreamed it. So why were you sleeping on the stairs.

Tori: Andre stayed over last night and kept me up all night. He played the piano at 4am in the morning and I...

Jade: (walks away).

Tori: I wasn't done talking.

Jade: I was done listening.

Random Kids are walking down the stairs and laughing on their PearPads while looking at Jade.

Random Kid: Hey Jade. If you had to choose between you elbow and your nose. You would pick your nose.

Jade: (sees Beck and Cat and slams locker) Hey.

Beck: Hey baby I was just looking for you.

Jade: Who told?

Cat: Told what?

Jade: About me. About me on PearMaps?

Beck: I I told no one.

Cat: I told people not to look.

Jade: Well, then it must have been Robbie... Wait. You told people not to look?

Cat: I tweeted it on TheSlap.

Jade: (walking closer slowly to Cat) What did you tweet?

Cat: I wrote... "Please DO NOT go on PearMaps and look up Hollywood Arts. If you do DO NOT look at Jade. P.S. She's NOT picking her nose". I made it super clear.

Jade: (runs towards Cat but Beck catches her)

Beck: Just run. Run fast and far.

Sinjin: (comes) Hey Jade. As a guy who used to pick his nose. I'm here to tell you. It gets better.

Jade: (moves around in Beck's arms and screams).

Cat: (runs away).

Sinjin: I'm sorry (runs away).

Beck: (strokes Jade's hair) Shh. Shh.

They both fall to the floor

To be continued.