List of posts by Robbie Shapiro

This is a listing of posts on TheSlap made by Robbie Shapiro.

Posts



 * Robbie: Hey, I'm finally on TheSlap.com! Write on my wall :)
 * Robbie: Thanks everyone for NOT writing on my wall! Really makes a guy feel good about himself.


 * Rex: Ha! No one writes on your board.
 * Jade: Looks like your puppet speaks the truth!
 * Robbie: HE IS NOT A PUPPET!


 * Cat: Hi, Robbie! I was watching this show last Saturday night, this live show thingy, and I saw this guy that looked EXACTLY like you!
 * Robbie: Was his name Andy?
 * Cat: YEEAAAAHH!
 * Robbie: I DO NOT look like him!
 * Beck: Oh yeah, you do look like that guy!
 * Jade: I thought you were going to bed early on Saturday. If you ACTUALLY went to bed early, you wouldn't have seen THAT late-night show! So, what were you doing?
 * Rex: Ha! I'm lovin' this!


 * Robbie: No, I was NOT in a terrible accident. That's a harmonica around my neck. Stop laughing.


 * Robbie: Caffeine makes me vibrate.Robbie.jpg


 * Robbie: There's nothing wrong with my pants! Stop asking.


 * Robbie: Wishing they'd just make a good soy cupcake!


 * Robbie: Allergic to sun?? How is that even possible? Apparently I'm allergic to the sun!


 * Robbie: Don't drink fish water! It's very bad ... excuse me while I puke. AGAIN!


 * Robbie: Awww. Dang it. I got toothpaste in my underwear again! It stings.


 * Robbie: Headed to NY. Going to my cousin's bar mitzvah. It's gonna be OFF THE HOOK.


 * Robbie: Some dude at the gym just called me "Mr Muscles". I think he was being sarcastic.
 * Rex: No, man. I'm sure they were serious. Did they also mention your awesome tan?
 * Robbie: Changed your password, Rex.
 * Rex: Changed it back, Robbie.


 * Robbie: Just found a sunscreen at the specialty drug store that's 187 SPF. Made my day!


 * Robbie: Do you think anyone would notice if I started using self tanning lotion?
 * Rex: No one notices you no matter what you do.


 * Robbie: Oh man, I have a zit and I'm all out of male makeup.


 * Robbie: Are boxer briefs still cool?


 * Robbie: Chillin' in HTown, tomorrow gonna visit peeps in the LBC.
 * Rex: Y'know, talking like that does NOT make you cool.
 * Cat: Where's HTown?


 * Robbie: People can be very inconsiderate ... I'm talking about you REX!!!!!
 * Jade: He's a puppet, not a person.
 * Robbie: That's offensive!!!!


 * Robbie: I'm trying to grow my chest hair out. It's harder than you'd think.
 * Rex: I have more chest hair than you!


 * Robbie: I am itchy because I didn't shower today.


 * Robbie: Rex!!!!!!!! Stop hacking my account!!


 * Robbie: Bought two tickets to the L.A. Soy Festival but Rex doesn't want to go. Anyone wanna come with?


 * Robbie: YEAH! I got the cookie! Take that Rex!
 * Tori: ?????
 * Jade: Ya know Robbie, you don't have to type every thought that comes into your head.


 * Robbie: So, apparently caviar is really, really, REALLY, expensive. Who knew?


 * Robbie: At a hospital. Are you allowed to take the bedpans home?


 * Robbie: Accidentally erased all my contacts so I need everyone's phone number again. Text 'em to me!


 * Robbie: Seriously guys, send me your digits. :)
 * Robbie: C'mon guys. I can't call anybody until i get some numbers!
 * Robbie: Anybody?


 * Robbie: Weird Question: Does anyone know how to do CPR on a parrot?
 * Beck:That is a weird question.
 * Tori:Why do you want to know?
 * Robbie: Ah never mind -- too late. There goes my birdsitting business.


 * Robbie: I'm not letting Rex carve his own pumpkin this year. Not after last year's "incident."


 * Robbie: This is NOT a perm.This is my natural curl. Girls love my hair.
 * Rex: You are delusional.


 * Robbie: Rex keeps prank calling me. It's getting annoying.
 * André: How is that even possible.


 * Robbie: Rex keeps kicking me in his sleep. I'm thinking about making him sleep on the dog bed.


 * Robbie: I ACTUALLY have plans this weekend!!!! Karaoke here I came!


 * Robbie: Rex turned back my clocks as a joke and I missed my date with the really hot girl from my Editing Class. :(


 * Robbie: I accidentally backed into the menorah and almost caught my backpack on fire. Hanukkah is dangerous!


 * Robbie: Monkeys are such curious beings. I wish I was a monkey.


 * Robbie: Sometimes I feel like Rex and I share a brain.
 * Cat: Wait, I'm confused. You don't?!?


 * Robbie: Working out.
 * Rex: Working out what? Math problems?


 * Robbie: I think I'd be a really good football player ... if I wan't allergic to pigskin.
 * Rex: Uh, Robbie. There's a lotta reasons why you can't play football.
 * Robbie: Oh yeah? Name one.
 * Rex: Your 'fro wouldn't fit in the helmet. You're weak and girly. You're afraid of locker rooms.
 * Robbie: I JUST asked for ONE!


 * Robbie: Jade said she loved my "Broken Glass" song. It's the first time she's ever complimented me!
 * Jade: And the last.


 * Robbie: Just rescheduled my dentist appt for February 14th. Not like I'm busy that day or anything.


 * Robbie: I just went to buy an apple and my credit card was rejected! I know I had at least 100 bucks in there!


 * Robbie: The producers said I was TOO "interesting" to be on The Wood.


 * Robbie: Happy Valentine's Day! Don't know why I'm so excited actually. Not like I'm doing anything... Again... Wow, this post got depressing quickly.


 * Robbie: Attention everyone... FREE COOKIES on my profile page!
 * Cat: Robbie, where are the cookies???


 * Robbie: Oh, I just wanted more fans so I thought if I wrote that more people would like me.
 * Beck: And your plan B is?


 * Robbie: I swear my neighbor's cat is evil. It keeps looking threateningly at me. I'm thinking about filing a restraining order.


 * Robbie: I can't believe my left shoe AND my car were stolen in the same week. And why would someone ONLY want ONE shoe! It doesn't make sense!


 * Robbie:I forgot to bring Rex to school today! I haven't been insulted in nearly 3 hours.


 * Robbie: I just got offered the role of the "before" guy on a workout commercial. Should I be offended?


 * Robbie: Movie night at the Vega house was SO FUN! I can't wait to do it again.
 * Tori: BTW Robbie, my dad says never come to our house again.


 * Robbie: Hanging out in Tori's bushes. Absolutely nothing is happening on her date with Ryder. I'm bored.
 * Sinjin: Oh really. Which bush are you in.
 * Robbie: The potted one on the porch.
 * Sinjin: Good choice.


 * Robbie: Aww man. I forgot to shave my toes again today.


 * Robbie: I've been looking for days and I still can't find that "Pee Minder" app. I DESPERATELY NEED IT!


 * Robbie: Note to self: Never go to the park and offer free ice cream to little kids. Their mothers get really angry and punchy.


 * Robbie: Anyone knows a good recipe for a delicious chickpea salad?
 * Rex: Okay that's it. Turn in your man card.


 * Robbie: Rex and I would buy a bunk bed, but we can't agree on who gets the top bunk. It's a dilemma!


 * Robbie: Even Tori's blood is pretty.
 * Tori: Okay, that might be the creepiest thing you've ever said.


 * Robbie: Gonna go ask Cat to the Prom. Wish me luck!
 * Rex: This is going to be ugly.
 * Jade: I agree with the puppet.
 * Tori: It's not Prom! It's PROME!


 * Robbie: Can you believe Rex thinks professional wrestling is legit? Some people just can't figure out what's real or fake.
 * Jade: Says the high school boy with an imaginary friend.
 * Rex: Yeah, you tell him sister! Oh... wait....


 * Robbie: I can bench press almost a FIFTH of my body weight!
 * Beck: How much do you weigh?
 * Robbie: About 140 lbs.
 * Tori: I'm not a mathematician. But I'm not sure I'd be bragging about that....


 * Robbie: Someone stole my bike seat. No, not my bike… my bike seat. Really, hurt to ride to school this morning.


 * Robbie: I bought a sketchbook so that I can impress my dates by drawing a picture of them. I saw that in a movie once
 * Rex: The sketch book is currently empty


 * Robbie: I need more fans on my Slap page. Even Trina has more than I do.
 * Rex: Ha! Ha! Ha! Nobody likes you!
 * Rex: Wait a minute, how do you have more fans than me? That's just wrong!


 * Robbie: Bought a new hat, sunglasses, and pair of jeans today! SCORE!
 * Rex: I'm looking at them right now.They're all women's!
 * Robbie: Stores REALLY need to start marking that on the tags!!!


 * Robbie: Wow. This mustache makes me feel so manly. I just wish I could grow one in real life!
 * Cat: Wow, you really DO look more manly with a mustache. You could probably get a lot more girls if you could grow one for real.
 * Robbie: Thanks Cat.


 * Robbie: Playing tic-tac-toe with Rex. Man, he never loses.
 * Robbie:
 * Robbie:


 * Robbie: I accidentally shaved off half the mustache I was growing. It took so long to grow, I'm debating keeping the other half.
 * Robbie: How come guys don't ever have tea parties? Who's up for tea at my place tonight?
 * Cat: I am!!!
 * Robbie: Cat, it's for guys only!
 * Rex: Can someone adopt me? Before tonight?


 * Robbie: I've been wearing my pants inside-out all day long! I hate getting dressed in the dark! (But if I dress with the lights on, Rex makes fun of me.)


 * Robbie: Srry fr typng ths wy. Rx rmvd ll th vwls n my kybrd.
 * Tori: What?
 * Rex: I disabled all the vowels on his keyboard. Classic Rex.


 * Robbie: Rex cut his toenails and left them all over my pillow. What did I ever do to him?
 * Rex: I don't know, why don't you ask the Golden Girls?


 * Robbie: I'm thinking it's not so good that the new principal only knows me as "that spazy kid."


 * Robbie: Anyone want to start a new secret handshake with me? I've got some great ideas.


 * Robbie: Left the room for 5 min and Rex ate my entire pizza! Rex, next time you're going to the bathroom with me!
 * Rex: That would not be my preferred destination
 * Tori: Rex, btw, how do you eat without a digestive system?


 * Robbie: Ugh, I have a wart on the bottom of my foot and it hurts to walk. Anyone wanna carry me to class? I'm lightweight.


 * Robbie: It's not weird that I have a life-size cut-out of Cat. I have life size cut-outs of ALL my pretty girl friends!


 * Robbie: One thing me and Batman have in common: we both have sidekicks. But I bet HIS sidekick doesn't make fun of him all the time. :(


 * Robbie: Last night I got run over by a rude bicyclist while power walking in Santa Monica! Why do I even wear a reflective vest if nobody pays attention?
 * Rex: Nobody pays attention to anything you do. So, I guess what you should be asking is "Why do I do anything?"


 * Robbie: I was thrown out for taking pictures at a funeral. The guy might have died but I really liked his outfit. Is that so bad?


 * Robbie: It's amazing how many compliments I've gotten since I've started wearing a fanny pack! I should have started this years ago
 * Rex: You don't pick up on sarcasm very well, do you?


 * Robbie: I've been mashing these potatoes for like 2 hours now! And they're still lumpy! Why won't you mash you stupid spuds!


 * Robbie: Take-out ketchup packets need to be redesigned! They always squirt in the wrong direction and get all over my clothes.


 * Robbie: How come when Tori couldn't pay her bill at Maestro's, they let her sing it off, but when I can't pay mine, they make me work in the kitchen?


 * Robbie: What's grosser: Stepping on gum barefoot or using the bathroom at a gas station?


 * Robbie: Hanukkah's great cuz I get presents 5 days before the rest of you!
 * Rex: Too bad your parents never buy you anything good for Hanukkah.
 * Robbie: That's beside the point.


 * Robbie: Beck just let me hug him. What a wonderful holiday moment!
 * Beck: I told you not to put that as your status.


 * Robbie: I just read in a magazine that being a nerd is "in." About time!
 * Rex: Unfortunately, I'd say you're less a nerd and more a dweeb.


 * Robbie: Gotta drive to the O.C. to pick up my grandma from the airport! An hour drive just so she could save $20 on her flight!
 * Beck: Don't call it the O.C.
 * Robbie: But it makes me sound cool
 * Beck: No it doesn't.


 * Robbie: I tried to kill a spider in my bedroom and missed. He's probably waiting until I fall asleep to get revenge.
 * Jade: Yeah, that's what I'd be doing if I was the spider.
 * Robbie: Aaaah, you're freaking my out!!!


 * Robbie: I had a taco for the first time and loved it! Tomorrow I'm trying a burrito! It's a spicy new world of flavor!


 * Robbie: Yes, I know my left butt cheek hangs lower than the other one. Can you all please stop pointing it out?
 * Jade: What's up with lefty?


 * Robbie: Opposites attract right? So I just need to find someone completely opposite than me to date!
 * Jade: So what you're saying is… you need to find a girl who is cool, attractive, fun, athletic, and has a great personality.
 * Robbie: Basically, yes.


 * Robbie: Y'know Tori, a GOOD girlfriend would be HAPPY to pop my back pimples.
 * Tori: I am NOT your girlfriend!!!


 * Robbie: I'm going to a thing at a place with Beck!
 * Beck: You know that was just a lie so we wouldn't have to hang out with Hope, right?
 * Robbie: Oh... then i put on my fancy shoes for nothing!


 * Robbie: Going to get my chest waxed! I'll reply later with all the deets!
 * Robbie: Okay, just got back from the waxing place. Guys, DON'T GET YOUR CHEST WAXED! So. Much. Pain.
 * Tori: Why'd you get your chest waxed anyway? You have three chest hairs.
 * Robbie: Cuz I'm sick of plucking them.


 * Robbie: Rex locked me out of my bedroom. Looks like I'm sleeping on the couch again.


 * Robbie: Trina just smashed my guitar to pieces. I wish someone could deliver this bad news to me thru song. :(


 * Robbie: I just threw away a pair of socks I've owned for 9 years. It was a sad moment.
 * Rex: Now, it's time to toss out your decade old underwear.
 * Robbie: Never!


 * Robbie: So… Can anyone guess what I am doing home at 10:30pm on a Friday?
 * Jade: No, and I'd rather not think about it.
 * Robbie: C'mon guess.
 * Jade: Uh, I don't know, something stupid like buffing your toe nails.
 * Robbie: ...whoa, good guess


 * Robbie: I just spent $100 on shoes for Rex. I wish he could wait to buy his clothes on sale.
 * Rex: Rex don't dress cheap.


 * Robbie: I almost got Tori to kiss me! Too bad the stupid Beverly Hills volcano had to ruin the moment!


 * Robbie: I'm so sick... snot is just pouring out. I'm gonna need a bigger box of tissues.


 * Robbie:I replaced all my chairs with exercise balls! Now I can get fit while I sit!


 * Robbie: Sikowitz just told me I need to take acting classes. But isn't that what I'm doing in his class?


 * Robbie: Not sure what smelled worse: uncooked squid or Kwakoo's nasty feet. I know now I never want to be a massage therapist.


 * Robbie: I went to the pond to feed the ducks and a big one bit me on the toosh! I'm never being nice to water fowl ever again!


 * Robbie: Okay. So i learned today not to eat too much of that special-digestion yogurt. If you need me i'll be in the boy's room.


 * Robbie: Just sent in my audition tape!!! Future rock stardom: Here i come!
 * Rex: Nothing will ever not happen as much as you being a rockstar is not going to happen.